Tomorrow is the day we've been waiting for - the chance to get pregnant again and finally have our little family. I can't believe tomorrow I'll be pregnant. I'm so nervous and really excited but mostly just confused.
Rob keeps telling me not to be too positive because he's afraid I might be setting myself up for a letdown. I'm afraid that if I'm not 100% convinced it will work then somehow my negative vibes will make it not work. You see my dilemma!! I can't decide how I'm supposed to feel.
Last week I was waiting for my blood test and a guy was there waiting to go in and provide his 'sample' while his wife was downstairs having her eggs harvested (it's a delightful process isn't it - very romantic). He was so excited and it was their first try so they had that innocence when you just believe everything will be fine. Rob and I were like that last time too and I miss that. It's so hard not to be jaded after what we've been through.
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Hi Kirsty...
ReplyDeleteWow...what exciting times! It's definitely great to be as positive as you are. I love reading your blog and just hope that the next 10 days flies by for you. I know how hard this wait is...it feels like an eternity. The best of luck to you both (I'm booked in to start again in March - I can't believe how long we have to wait!!) Lots of love and best wishes, Sandra xx
I know these entries have been a way to air your own feelings but I can't tell you how much they have helped me out this year. When I'm driving myself around the bend feeling frustrated and confused I read your entries and feel as though there is someone else out there that has an idea of how I am feeling.
ReplyDeleteToday is a particularly bad day and when I read your last entry "I'm afraid that if I'm not 100% convinced it will work then somehow my negative vibes will make it not work. You see my dilemma!! I can't decide how I'm supposed to feel" I know exactly what you mean. I keep trying to tell myself that "I'm healthy and fertile" and that "it will happen", but the disappointment I feel at the moment is so hard to shake that I'm struggling to remain positive and then the negative thoughts come in and then I think well that's not helping!! AHHH.
So thank you for being brave enough to put your feelings out there, you make a difference more than you can imagine.