Hello Old Friend

Over the weekend I said to Rob that I was going to take some time to get back to writing my blog.  He, being the IT nerd and all round geek that he is, promptly informed me that blogging is passe and blogs probably wont exist soon.  Here I am anyway.  I don't care what the current popularity or cool factor of blogging is, I used to love this little space of mine and I enjoyed keeping our family memories documented. Even if nobody else reads it I don't mind because it's just for me. Today I've looked back through old posts - so many fleeting moments of Noah's life captured and I knew for sure that I wanted to get back on here and get more of our memories down as they happen day to day.  I might even try and makeup for lost time with some retrospective posts about Harper (the forgotten but very loved second child!) There are no lovingly scribed baby albums in this house, just this space so I'm recommitted to making it current.

I blame Facebook - I really do.  I was hesitant to join Facebook for a long time - I was a relative latecomer. I was a bit smug about it.  I used to say things like 'I have friends in real life I don't need to be friends with 200 people on the computer'. (I say old lady things like 'on the computer' because I'm a bit weird and out of touch like that.)  Eventually it came to the point where I was missing out on play dates and events because they were being arranged through Facebook, so I took the leap.

Facebook has it's place - it basically did what I had been attempting to do with my blog for years. It allowed me to share photos and stories about our lives with friends and family anywhere around the world.  The trouble is FB is such a quick and easy fix that I stopped taking the time to sit and share longer stories. The instant gratification of FB is addictive.  Blogging is more of a slow boil and lots of what is written goes un-noticed but at least it's all laid out there to look back on in a pure form not lost between pictures of cats riding robot vacuums and photos of Rugby players consuming their own urine!! (True Story)

FB also steals so much more time that you ever realise as you find yourself reaching for it more and more throughout the day just to see what new tidbit has popped up in your news feed.  So I'm taking a step back from FB and focusing on quality blogging time instead.

All of this is part of a bigger picture.  I have made a vow to myself to change the way I manage my time.  I am ALWAYS busy.  I literally run from one thing to the next and I feel like no part of my life is getting the correct focus.  I know a do a good job.  Our home is clean and tidy, there are clean clothes in the drawers and a meal on the table every night.  The kids are happy, healthy beautiful kids and they get lots of love and attention.  It's me though - I'm exhausted.  Physically, mentally, emotionally. This has been a tough year there have been bigger challenges than 'normal' but when is life ever 'normal'.  Rob likes to remind me a lot that there is always something.  I can often be heard saying things like 'After X,Y,Z event is over life will calm down and I'll do that task'.  No more.

I want to get to a place where no matter what external factors are in play I don't feel like every day is one constant ball of chaos.  Rushing here and there yelling at kids to hurry, hurry, hurry.  Putting out fires all day long then getting to 7pm and collapsing in a heap with no sense of accomplishment.

One of the first things I need to do is re-instate my exercise regime.  There is a lot to be said for exercising in the morning and feeling that you've achieved something before the day has even started for most people.

I constantly over commit.  I am a YES person.  This month I am pulling back from everything that is not absolutely necessary.  I have lots of wonderful friends and I like to do the right thing and keep in touch with them all.  It's very time consuming.  Don't get me wrong time with friends adds so much value to your life but surely a month without coffee dates and outings won't kill any friendships. Not to mention I actually quite enjoy being alone and being in my own company.

There are tasks in my life that have literally been building up for 6 years that now need to be done. (Kids memorabilia boxes piled high, nothing with dates on it) I have made a start already this week and it feels great.

This post is a bit lot rambley but hey it's my blog I can ramble if I want to.

See you tomorrow