Robbie has turned 30

Yesterday was Rob's 30th Birthday. It's so disappointing that his toy boy days are over - I no longer have a husband in his 20's!!

Anyway we had a nice dinner at Uncle Billy's (that's a restaurant - not a person) and went to see the new Cirque du Soleil show "Varekai". It was really fabulous as always (I think this is our 3rd Cirque show that we've seen).

On Saturday night we're having a party with family and friends, not only to celebrate Rob's birthday but also the long awaited PhD pass result.

Declan's Birthday

It's Declan's 3rd Birthday today. He had a party on Sunday which was lots of fun and Rob and I ate ourselves sick on kids party food. Declan is right into the movie 'Cars' which is a really cool kids film from Pixar (Toys, A Bug's Life etc) - anyway he absolutely loves it and the main character is a red race car called Lightning McQueen. Obviously everyone knows this so all his presents were toys from the film. Yesterday when I was looking after him we got to build and play with loads of fun new cars and trucks - it was mint. Here's some pictures from the party.

Rob getting into the party spirit!!

All the adults hanging around the kids party food.

The gorgeous Reuben (Declan's little brother - 8.5 months old)

The Birthday Boy - mmmmm ice cream cake

(The photos are courtesy of Jack Andrys photographer extraordinaire)

Autopsy Results

We saw our OB and got Banjo's autopsy results on Wednesday August 1st but it was all very confusing and overwhelming so I haven't written about it till now. I've had time to think about it and research it on the Internet and I think I've got a bit of a handle on what it all means for the future.

What the autopsy showed was that my placenta and Banjo's organs were infected with Group B Strep (GBS). This is a bacteria that is well known to doctors and is usually checked in all pregnant women at around 36/37 weeks. It is commonly thought to only pass to babies during the birthing process and so infected women are treated with antibiotics when they go in to labour to protect their soon to be born child.

In our case however, the GBS (which I had never been tested for) passed to Banjo in utero and caused him to eventually stop breathing. At first we were really confused about this because our doctor said they really don't know how this happens and it's almost unheard of. They have some theories about the IVF procedures pushing the bacteria up into the uterus but it's just speculation.

What worried me about this rare occurrence of in utero GBS was if they don't know how it happens how can they stop it happening again.

What we have been able to do is find information on the Internet which confirms that Prenatal Onset Group B Strep (POGBS) is known and there is information out there about how to handle it.

They say knowledge is power and I must say that being able to find more information is helping me be more positive about the future.

Here are some links to websites about GBS and POGBS

http://www.obgyn.net/pregnancy-birth/?page=/pregnancy-birth/articles/prenatal_onset_group_B_strep

http://www.groupbstrepinternational.org/

Excuse me I've lost my mind!!

I forgot to tell you all a funny story that happened last weekend. Rob and I headed off on a gorgeous sunny morning to take Cleo for a walk down the dog beach - something we do most weekends. We stopped for iced coffee at Hillarys Shops and we bumped in to Danni and Pom. As we stood chatting to Danni telling her we were headed down to the beach blah blah blah she innocently said "oh so Cleo's in the car waiting is she?"

Rob and I looked at each other and in that second we realised neither of us had brought the dog!!! Clearly we have lost our minds. Anyway Rob headed home and there was Cleo waiting patiently in the driveway wondering where we'd gone.

Tough Day

Today hasn't been a very good day. I don't know why but I've been feeling extra sad today and really missing Banjo and feeling angry at the universe for taking him away.

Even though it seems like a stupid thing to do when I've already been in a funk all day - I just cleaned up the nursery and organised all Banjo's cards and memorabilia and it sort of made me feel better. It reminded me of all of the fantastic family and friends we have and how supportive you've all been and how lucky we really are.

It also made me start thinking about all the awesome things Banjo and I did while he was inside me. Special memories of the 6 months I spent carrying him around. I'm so grateful that he shared mine and Robbie's wedding day and came on our cruise around New Zealand. Banjo and I totally rocked out with Jess at the Pink concert (down the front in the mosh pit!!) When I was looking after Declan he would ask me if the baby was in my tummy and when I said yes he would pull up my shirt and then his shirt and put his naked tummy on mine for a cuddle. It was really special and beautiful.

I miss Banjo every minute of every day but some days are just harder than others.